Who takes the blame?
Who takes the blame? It’s easy for anyone and everyone to blame events, people, and situations for whatever phase they’re in. It’s too easy to shift that blame and rid yourself of accountability or responsibility. I mean, our minds and hearts bear the burden of a few regrets and terrible choices, but it’s heart-wrenching to put all that responsibility on ourselves – talk about kicking a person when they’re down.
So what do we do? We blame whatever is convenient to be blamed. Then I’d say my last relationship didn’t work out because my ex is a monster, but you chose that ex-partner, so shouldn’t a portion of the blame be on you for poor choices?
Then you’d say, I always have friends who are jealous and envious of me, but you forget that the common factor here is you, so in reality, you’re responsible for who you bring into your circle and that wrong decision has you to blame.
How about not meeting new people? Oh yes, the blame is on the community, perhaps the country, but how about blame on your inability to put yourself out there, to go out to events, walk to the parks, smile more at strangers, or put an effort to strike a conversation with someone about the weather, politics of whatever interests you. Even a stretch further can be how receptive you are to the few who seek friendships with you. We don’t know the extent to which we contribute to our issues.
This dynamic of blame shifting shows up in too many instances, but if we learned the art of honest soul searching, it might be much easier to look within, look inside, and do better.
I often say, if you know better, you’d do better. The issue of blame-shifting is a dirty business, and if we aren’t mindful enough to nip in the bud, we may spend years in an illusion that we are a result of the hands we were dealt. While that might be true, a more accurate analogy is that you’re a result of your choices, even with the hands you’ve been dealt.
See, we all have a choice – that’s the gift of free will. “Do as you please,” but remember that actions and inactions have consequences. It may look cute to blame your parents at age 19, but at 40, that’s on you and how you’ve decided to move forward with life.
If we were capable of pure honesty, we might realize that we’re to blame or have a portion of the blame on how events have turned out or not turned out. Blame shifting is a comfort or a luxury everyone has, but maturity is introspection and taking mental notes of how change is required.
No one should think it’s that simple because how would a person not blame their father for turning out a bad husband because those were the examples he saw? That’s hard! You mean they should now admit it’s all their fault – that’s not easy.
In the end, you know better, do better, and I hope that some soul-searching starts today on some critical matters or resentments we’ve had towards others. Peace is for those who desire peace.
Who takes the blame?
In other news, the new poetry collection just dropped; please check it out. Thank you!
Peter
Hmmm… Who takes the blame, definitely not the gods! Ola Rotimi already established that.
What are you really asking Presh? That we should take those well crafted blames and excuses and lay them squarely on our shoulders? That’s a tall order. But hey, truth is bitter. A bitter pill we all gotta swallow. We gotta do better now we know better. It’s called taking responsibility.
p.chidera.admin
PeterYou get it! taking responsibility is hard but we have to do better regardless.
Special thanks to Ola Rotimi 😄
Nekky
It’s fair enough to take the blame and also the responsibility…….but a sincere “sorry” goes a long way.It may take a while,but it helps to heal. Amazing write up!
p.chidera.admin
NekkyYou’re so right on this. Sincere apologies make all the difference. Thank you! ☺️