The poem I wrote for you – the words I never said

The poem I wrote for you – the words I never said

So you asked me what I’d write about you
You’d want to know what the words would say
Perhaps if the first letter starts with your name
Or maybe I’ll spill my deepest confessions
With a sprinkle of some hate speech, you’d imagine I have by now
But I’ll have a shy smile because deep down, I’m nervous

So you’d ask me if I have words dedicated to you
You’d yearn to get it right out of my lips
Tasting all the alphabet like you’ve done a few times
Perhaps if the last line would say you’re evil
Or maybe I’ll say you’re not special
And perhaps I’d curse the minutes I watched you in silence
But I’ll have a shy smile because deep down, I am trembling

So you’d not ask me if I miss you
You may not need to know the truth about that
Or maybe it’s a fair share of some reality that isn’t a fact
With all the pathetic doses of assuming mixed with several portions of the ego
And perhaps I’ll make it worse with my silence and calm dismiss
But I’ll have a polite facade because deep down, my heart is broken

So you’d send a letter I read without emotions
My response would be some lines of fatality
You may wonder if my heart got cold
Or maybe I never really felt that good
With all the ways I carry on like I don’t care
And perhaps I’ll cement that with how I laugh
But you don’t know I’ve held you in my dreams 

So you’d ask me what I’d write about you
You asked me that time the sun was out
as my purple threads rubbed against your skin
You’d read this and wonder about you
Second-guessing what line is directed to pierce your heart
With all the ways I’ve confused you
But you don’t know I’ve imagined it all

So you don’t know I’ve missed you as much
Maybe it’s the many drinks tonight, but I’ve only had glasses from the water jug
I’d give up soon, but your heart might flutter a while longer
Spinning but never falling

If you asked me what I’d write about you
It’ll be some blurry words that tell you never to let go
It’ll spell incorrectly that I ask you to find me through beating hearts, fear, and faith
Smoldering me with warm hugs that shame the cold
The faded line would read something about a sincere desire

This might be the words I never say

The poem I wrote for you – the words I never said.