3 Things I’d Say To Your Aching Heart
You couldn’t handle yourself, so you’re somewhere in between their 5th photo on Instagram, and you’re miserable, and they’re happy. They’re dancing with red lights and blue sparkles, and you’re in a corner, lights out with only this phone screen and the dead silence. You think they’re happy.
This particular post isn’t to tell you that it’s a lie that you believe they’re happy; I couldn’t tell you that it’s so true that they’re miserable between the bottles popping and the DJ’s Playlist. I couldn’t know that, but here’s a few things I need you to understand through this heartbreak phase.
1. You’re going to be okay. The famous line, huh, the same one you heard yesterday, and you almost got visibly angry cause you don’t believe it, and people say stupid things to try to get you feeling better, but honestly, you’ll be fine. Think about the last relationship you had; think about how miserable you were till you thought you’d never breathe after they left. Well, look at you now, you got into another one, and you’re just at the same spot as last time. What’s to say that this case is different and you wouldn’t find someone, and you’d shed happy tears soon. Who’s to say that six months from now, you probably wouldn’t remember how much it was hurting today. So you see, you’re going to be okay.
2. Downtime is allowed. The minor relapses you have three months after you think you’re stronger are permitted. It’s normal, and you’ll be fine. The tears you catch yourself shedding or the tight knot in your chest when someone says their name or another photo shows up, those downtimes are allowed. It simply means you’re letting yourself be aware of the pain and live through it. You are not shoving it under the carpet for one day when the dust can’t stay buried. Downtimes are allowed.
3. They’re not happy too. Forget the overly excited facade they’re putting up. If we’re all human and they’re a human, then it must hurt too, but they stay winning because they are mastering their emotions on the outside and maybe breaking harder on the inside. But who cares? You’re going to grow through it, and you’ll be fine. You’ll be perfectly okay.
Feel better now? No? Yes? Just keep trying, and when you break, try again. It’s always soothing words to myself. There’s no guarantee that these words make a difference if you’re going through a loss, but I hope it makes you réalise that I’m writing from the point of self-direct experience from this ache that you might feel and I know you’ll be fine. I broke too many times, but I must confess I’m stronger now, wearing scars like trendy tattoos, and I stay winning. You could do the same. Grow and bloom through this season.
You’ll be happy. Soon. Real soon.